This is how Miss Colombia must've felt.
Yesterday morning was my test day. My OB told me to wait for 2 weeks after the procedure and the last progesterone supplement before taking a pregnancy test. This is to avoid a false positive just in case the HCG trigger is still in my system.
So I waited. For 2 weeks. Although… I tested a week ago just to see if I still had some HCG and sure enough, I got a 2nd faint line. So I thought, because it's faint the hormone must be on its way out.
Jay wanted to be there when I take the PT. I would normally do it behind his back because I want to surprise him. But this time he insisted that I wake him up when I'm about to test. I woke up at around 4am because I felt the need to pee. I also woke Jay up and we did the test. We prayed while waiting for the result, then I went to the bathroom to check and there it was. A faint second line. But a line nonetheless. Jay saw it too so I knew my eyes weren't playing tricks on me. Now if you've been trying to conceive for many years, you must've visited every blog, forum and website about getting pregnant, then you know that a faint second line is a positive result.
So I was happy. Jay was cautiously happy. But I just couldn't stop thanking God for the answered prayer. I texted my OB and told her that it was just a faint line. She said that's okay because it might just be too early and I can do a repeat test the next day. She also told me to continue with my progesterone supplements.
We were so excited we wanted to tell the world. But we kept it to ourselves because we need to know for sure. We've had 2 false positives in the past so we were very cautious but it didn't stop us from planning on how to break the news to our family. We don't celebrate Valentine's day, but we thought it was a cool Valentine's gift. I already downloaded a pregnancy app and if I were pregnant the baby would've been as small as a poppy seed. Exciting times!
We went to church and had breakfast then Jay had to go to work. I tried to buy some medicine but it was out of stock so I just went home and fell asleep.
Our friend Jem came over with her baby and I hung out with them for a bit then went to the loo. That's when I noticed something in the toilet bowl. There was a very small pinkish blob. Then I realized that I was bleeding. I took a bath because it was really hot and good thing I have one pad at home so I could monitor the bleeding. I messaged Jay and our OB. I was panicking, crying and praying… pleading with God. I didn't know what to pray. I don't know if I was miscarrying or if I had a false positive and was already having my period.
I stayed in bed, afraid to move. My OB replied and told me to take another test the next day if the bleeding continues. It did continue. Like in-your-face-you're-not-pregnant-it-was-a-false-positive kind of bleeding. I'm slowly coming to terms that it's a failed IUI. The faint second line might still be because of the HCG. And I'm already having my period now.
I waited for Jay to come home so I can cry some more. I was so confused and felt like my heart was breaking into a million pieces. Even if I knew the success rate for IUI (and it's not very high), I just put everything on the line. I put whatever faith I can afford in God.
Sometimes I don't know how faith works anymore. I have more questions than answers. But we choose to believe and trust. And just like what Jay said in his prayer this morning, we'll continue to serve & praise God. We'll keep on going. We'll try again. We'll rest, save up, then try again. And again.
Monday, February 15, 2016
Tuesday, February 9, 2016
IUI Cost - Philippines
IUI is expensive. You have to prepare your finances and have a game plan about it. As I've shared in my other post, we used our money from our 13th month pay to pay for the IUI.
Below is a breakdown of our expenses starting from before our IUI cycle even started. In my previous post I mentioned that I haven't had my period for 82 days so my OB prescribed a medicine to jumpstart it, and we'll start from there.
Duphaston - 65/piece x 10 - 650
Follicle monitoring - 1,000/ultrasound x 3 - 3,000
Clomiphene* - 100/piece x 10 - 1,000
Gonal-F - 3,000/shot x 3 - 9,000
HCG Trigger - 3,000/shot x 1 - 3,000
IUI Procedure** - 9,629.76
Professional fee*** - 5,000
Utrogestan - 62/capsule x 15 - 930
Total: 32, 209.76
*This is the generic name. I can't remember the brand I bought, but this was the cheapest in Mercury Cubao at that time, the other one was around 200+
**Our IUI procedure was done in St. Lukes QC in their Advanced Reproductive Care Unit (ARCU)
***Our OB/RE's clinic at St. Lukes QC and her name is Lorelyn Madamba
Below is a breakdown of our expenses starting from before our IUI cycle even started. In my previous post I mentioned that I haven't had my period for 82 days so my OB prescribed a medicine to jumpstart it, and we'll start from there.
Duphaston - 65/piece x 10 - 650
Follicle monitoring - 1,000/ultrasound x 3 - 3,000
Clomiphene* - 100/piece x 10 - 1,000
Gonal-F - 3,000/shot x 3 - 9,000
HCG Trigger - 3,000/shot x 1 - 3,000
IUI Procedure** - 9,629.76
Professional fee*** - 5,000
Utrogestan - 62/capsule x 15 - 930
Total: 32, 209.76
*This is the generic name. I can't remember the brand I bought, but this was the cheapest in Mercury Cubao at that time, the other one was around 200+
**Our IUI procedure was done in St. Lukes QC in their Advanced Reproductive Care Unit (ARCU)
***Our OB/RE's clinic at St. Lukes QC and her name is Lorelyn Madamba
Monday, February 8, 2016
Our IUI Story (Part 2)
Okay, so let's get down to business.
After our failed cycle where I had some stims (medications taken to stimulate ovulation) and timed intercourse, I went back to my OB and told her straight that we want to try IUI. So I asked her the usual questions, like how does it work (even if I already know how, thanks to Youtube and Google), and how much it would cost because we need to prepare our finances. She told me that I should budget not just the finances but also my time, because it's very time consuming.
Now when I met with her before we started the IUI cycle, I haven't had my period yet, and I haven't had it for about 82 days. And no, I wasn't pregnant. So she put me on meds to induce my period and advised me to get a TVS (transvaginal ultrasound) to get a baseline for my follicle monitoring, and also to check if there are any left over follicles from the previous cycle. Everything should be timed accordingly.
Now, let me share some tips that will help you prepare for an IUI. Again, I'm not an expert, just somebody who's "been there, done that". It's still best to follow your OB/RE's advice.
Tip #1: Time Your Consultation with Your OB/RE
-If your period is irregular and you haven't had it in a loooong time, you can go straight to your OB so she can give you some medicine to jumpstart your period. Otherwise, you can just go on or before your first day of period because the first day will be the baseline of when you will be taking your ovulation meds and your follicle monitoring.
Tip #2: Check Your Schedule
-When trying to conceive, timing is everything. There was a time when I thought of taking a leave of absence because I know how the whole process is going to affect my time at work. Thank God I have amazing co-workers who understood my situation and I just think it's God's providence that during the week that I'll be having most of my check-ups, my shift started at 11am, so instead of going half-day, I only had to be late for a couple of hours. But I had to be absent on the day of the procedure. However, my husband's rest day is Thursday-Friday, and the procedure fell on a Friday! That means he didn't have to be absent. So yeah, you also have to take into consideration both you and your hubby's schedule. If both of you are working, it's best to give your manager, supervisor, or immediate boss a heads up that you will be undergoing a procedure and that there may be days that you'll be absent or late. In some companies, your have to file your leaves a month in advance, and the tricky thing about timing your leaves is almost everything about IUI will be based on your first day of period. So if you know a month in advance when your period will be, then you can start filing your leaves now. Or just bite the bullet and say goodbye to your attendance incentives (if you have any).
Tip #3: Be Brave
-I have just unlocked a level of bravery because of the shots I had to take to ovulate. I'm no stranger to needles, but I haven't done any self-injection until I started the IUI process. It was exciting and frightening all at the same time. I was actually more concerned about how to prepare the injection than the actual insertion of the needle. Of course my OB gave a demo by doing the first shot. The 2nd shot was done by my officemate who's a registered nurse. That was during the previous cycle. For this cycle, I took home the shots and administered both myself. The needle is very small, similar to what's used for insulin shots. So whether or not you'll be self-injecting or going back to the OB for your shots (which I found to be impractical that's why I took mine home), now's the time to face your fears because it will all be worth it in the end. :)
Tip #4: Set Aside a Budget for it
-TTC is expensive. Even if you don't go through IUI or even IVF, it's still going to be expensive. The medicines you have to take are expensive. Ultrasounds are expensive. Consultation with a specialist is expensive. That's why we timed our IUI after Christmas because that's when we have extra money. But we also tried to save more by cutting down our expenses. Thank God I married a budget-conscious husband.
Tip #5: Prayer Works
-Just pray. Have faith and believe that whatever the result may be, God is still in control. We can only do so much. Science can only do so much. Everything will still be up to God and His perfect timing. We are in our waiting period right now and I can't help but be anxious sometimes. So we always pray for God to give us peace of mind. Keep on trusting.
Now let me share with you my time line for my IUI. It all started with day 71 of my previous cycle.
January 4 - CD71. consultation with the doctor, told her we've decided to do the IUI. OB gave me prescription for Duphaston that I have to take for 10 days to jumpstart my period. She also told me to schedule an ultrasound anytime between day 3-5 of my period. Took my first tablet of Duphaston on this day too.
January 16 - CD1. First day of period. 2 Days after my last Duphaston tablet.
January 20 - CD5. Baseline scan for follicle monitoring.
There you have it. Our TTC is a very long journey, and we don't know yet when it will end. But we'll continue to pray, believe and have faith, not only for us to have a baby, but for our (including yours) deepest desires to be met by our loving Father.
I'll continue with the financial side of IUI in my next post. See yah!
After our failed cycle where I had some stims (medications taken to stimulate ovulation) and timed intercourse, I went back to my OB and told her straight that we want to try IUI. So I asked her the usual questions, like how does it work (even if I already know how, thanks to Youtube and Google), and how much it would cost because we need to prepare our finances. She told me that I should budget not just the finances but also my time, because it's very time consuming.
Now when I met with her before we started the IUI cycle, I haven't had my period yet, and I haven't had it for about 82 days. And no, I wasn't pregnant. So she put me on meds to induce my period and advised me to get a TVS (transvaginal ultrasound) to get a baseline for my follicle monitoring, and also to check if there are any left over follicles from the previous cycle. Everything should be timed accordingly.
Now, let me share some tips that will help you prepare for an IUI. Again, I'm not an expert, just somebody who's "been there, done that". It's still best to follow your OB/RE's advice.
Tip #1: Time Your Consultation with Your OB/RE
-If your period is irregular and you haven't had it in a loooong time, you can go straight to your OB so she can give you some medicine to jumpstart your period. Otherwise, you can just go on or before your first day of period because the first day will be the baseline of when you will be taking your ovulation meds and your follicle monitoring.
Tip #2: Check Your Schedule
-When trying to conceive, timing is everything. There was a time when I thought of taking a leave of absence because I know how the whole process is going to affect my time at work. Thank God I have amazing co-workers who understood my situation and I just think it's God's providence that during the week that I'll be having most of my check-ups, my shift started at 11am, so instead of going half-day, I only had to be late for a couple of hours. But I had to be absent on the day of the procedure. However, my husband's rest day is Thursday-Friday, and the procedure fell on a Friday! That means he didn't have to be absent. So yeah, you also have to take into consideration both you and your hubby's schedule. If both of you are working, it's best to give your manager, supervisor, or immediate boss a heads up that you will be undergoing a procedure and that there may be days that you'll be absent or late. In some companies, your have to file your leaves a month in advance, and the tricky thing about timing your leaves is almost everything about IUI will be based on your first day of period. So if you know a month in advance when your period will be, then you can start filing your leaves now. Or just bite the bullet and say goodbye to your attendance incentives (if you have any).
Tip #3: Be Brave
-I have just unlocked a level of bravery because of the shots I had to take to ovulate. I'm no stranger to needles, but I haven't done any self-injection until I started the IUI process. It was exciting and frightening all at the same time. I was actually more concerned about how to prepare the injection than the actual insertion of the needle. Of course my OB gave a demo by doing the first shot. The 2nd shot was done by my officemate who's a registered nurse. That was during the previous cycle. For this cycle, I took home the shots and administered both myself. The needle is very small, similar to what's used for insulin shots. So whether or not you'll be self-injecting or going back to the OB for your shots (which I found to be impractical that's why I took mine home), now's the time to face your fears because it will all be worth it in the end. :)
 |
| It's a baby needle! No need to be scared. |
 |
| Family Picture! |
 |
| Don't be intimidated by this bad boy! It's only used to get the medicine from the bottle. |
Tip #4: Set Aside a Budget for it
-TTC is expensive. Even if you don't go through IUI or even IVF, it's still going to be expensive. The medicines you have to take are expensive. Ultrasounds are expensive. Consultation with a specialist is expensive. That's why we timed our IUI after Christmas because that's when we have extra money. But we also tried to save more by cutting down our expenses. Thank God I married a budget-conscious husband.
Tip #5: Prayer Works
-Just pray. Have faith and believe that whatever the result may be, God is still in control. We can only do so much. Science can only do so much. Everything will still be up to God and His perfect timing. We are in our waiting period right now and I can't help but be anxious sometimes. So we always pray for God to give us peace of mind. Keep on trusting.
Now let me share with you my time line for my IUI. It all started with day 71 of my previous cycle.
January 4 - CD71. consultation with the doctor, told her we've decided to do the IUI. OB gave me prescription for Duphaston that I have to take for 10 days to jumpstart my period. She also told me to schedule an ultrasound anytime between day 3-5 of my period. Took my first tablet of Duphaston on this day too.
January 16 - CD1. First day of period. 2 Days after my last Duphaston tablet.
January 20 - CD5. Baseline scan for follicle monitoring.
- Endometrium thickness: 0.38cm
- One developing follicle on each ovary
- Was prescribed to take Clomiphene, 2x a day for 5 days. Took first tablet on the same day.
January 25 - CD10. First day of Gonal-F. Self-injected.
January 26 - CD11. Second day of Gonal-F. My OB initially prescribed 2 shots of Gonal-F because my body responded to it pretty well during the first cycle.
January 27 - CD12. Follicle monitoring. Showed results to my OB. I have 2 follicle-candidates and one even grew to 2.0cm but doc said it still needs to grow bigger. She gave me another shot of Gonal-F. Follies in my left ovary were very lazy.
January 28 - CD13. Follow up follicle monitoring. Took Jay with me this time. The 2 follicles both grew bigger! Yey! The bigger one was about 2.2cm. Doc gave me my HCG shot to make my follicle pop and release the golden egg. IUI was scheduled for the next day.
January 29 - CD14. IUI day. We arrived at around 12nn at the hospital. Jay's sperm was collected first then washed. The nurse said it will take around 2 hours to prepare the sperm so we had lunch first. When we got back to the hospital, we waited for 30 minutes or so, then I was asked to go to the procedure room and wait for my OB. The procedure was painless. It's like getting a pap smear. Best thing about it was Jay was there the entire time. He even wanted to watch the procedure but I convinced him to stay beside me. After the procedure, doc prescribed some medicine (Utrogestan) to help thicken my lining for implantation, and to help the baby stick if it results to pregnancy. I then had to lay still for almost an hour. I just played solitaire on my phone.
There you have it. Our TTC is a very long journey, and we don't know yet when it will end. But we'll continue to pray, believe and have faith, not only for us to have a baby, but for our (including yours) deepest desires to be met by our loving Father.
I'll continue with the financial side of IUI in my next post. See yah!
Friday, February 5, 2016
Our IUI Story… or our TTC Story so far (Part 1)
Okay. Soooo. Intrauterine Insemination.
Sounds complicated, expensive and scary.
First, because it's a mouthful, and could be tricky to spell. Three words or Two words? Is there a dash somewhere there? And also because the pronunciation differs from one person to another. Intra-yoo-te-reen or intra-yoo-te-rayn? Thank God for abbreviations! :) We can just stick with IUI.
So what is it and how does it work? If you are having some fertility issues, or you have a friend or a family member who's been trying for yeeeears to have a baby, maybe this post will help you understand the process. I'm not an expert, so it's still best to consult a specialist. :) I'll just be sharing what Jay and I went through financially, physically, emotionally and mentally, for the last 5 years.
Here we go… Warning: Looooooong post ahead. (But I'll cut this post into 2 parts to hopefully trick your brain that it's not that long).
Just a not-so-quick background, Jay and I have been married for 5 years and we started trying to get pregnant right off the bat. I secretly wished for a honeymoon baby and I must've put a great deal of pressure on Jay at that time. Poor guy. My idea then was: First comes love, then comes marriage, then comes a baby (in a baby carriage! I know you want to sing it), with a very short time interval between the last two events. Love and marriage happened at the perfect time. The third one, well, we're getting there. I just thought it would happen really quickly.
Now I'm not the type who tracks her monthly period. I just didn't see the need for it until after a couple of months of trying to conceive (TTC) unsuccessfully. And I started tracking not just my period, but also our BD's (Check this post if you want to know what this is. Haha). When it didn't work by August after doing the deed as often as humanly possible (Beyb and I got married on May 2011), my dad recommended that I consult one of her clients who's an OB-GYN. She just told me to lose weight, eat healthy and to continue with our BD on certain days of the month. All were such a good idea, if your monthly period comes like clockwork. We never went back to her. Jay also didn't like her because she spent a great deal of time promoting organic foods during our first and only consultation. We couldn't say good bye to our late night fast-food runs. Yep, that's the perk of living in close proximity to 5 McDonald's stores which are open 24/7.
Dr. #1 was the first of many OB-GYNs we would visit over the course of 5 years. We are now on our 8th, and hopefully our last. Three of those doctors are Reproductive Endocrinologists or infertility experts. Our first RE was very motherly. She encouraged me to lose weight, and she gave me fertility pills to help me ovulate. She was the one who ordered for a TVS (transvaginal ultrasound) to check my ovaries and that's when I found out I have PCOS. However, she also had a lot of patients that we had to wait a minimum of 2 hours to see her whether we're the first patient in line or not. And consultations with her were very short and a lot of times I have to tell her AGAIN what's wrong with me. Or the other way around. "Oh, those pimples on your chin, that means you have PCOS." Yeah, tell me something I don't know, doc. I felt like a number, just another patient she needs to see. So we parted ways and never looked back.
Our 2nd RE was intimidating and Jay never had the chance to meet her. She's a very methodical, straightforward, no-nonsense doctor. The first time I met her, she gave me a piece of paper with her fertility plan. It included constant medication for 6 months to regulate my period, 3 months of taking clomiphene to help me ovulate (you can't do it for more than 3 consecutive months), and other procedures along the way. She has 4 clinics and I just got tired of following her around. Also, during the time I was seeing her, I had just started with my new job and I couldn't skip work, and she's veeeeery strict with the timing of the check-ups and follicle monitoring. So our relationship just didn't work out. We called it quits after 3 cycles.
Before meeting my 3rd RE, I had an in between doctor. By the way, we also choose doctors who are accredited by our company's HMO provider. My dad had another client who's an OB-Gyn, and she was actually my sister-in-law's OB when she gave birth to her daughter. She's like a family friend, so I was very comfortable with her. However, she focused more on making me lose my weight that she wanted me to try the south beach diet since it worked for her. Don't get me wrong. I've tried countless of times to lose weight, to no avail. And in my head I would always reason out that other overweight women were able to get pregnant, so why lose weight? Hahaha. I have friends who would come up to me and tell me that a relative who's bigger than me, and who also has PCOS was able to get pregnant. So out of frustration, we decided to just stop for the mean time and rest.
TTC is very exhausting. I realized that my threshold for undergoing consecutive fertility treatments is just 3 cycles. After 3 unsuccessful cycles, I'm just not able to go through it emotionally and psychologically.
After resting for almost a year, Jay and I decided to go work on our baby project more eagerly. And that's when we met RE #3. You can see the other details about my experience with her in this post, and at the same time read about what happened in my cycle before our IUI.
But rest your eyes first, stretch your legs, go get some water, and I'll be back with part 2 of this post. :)
First, because it's a mouthful, and could be tricky to spell. Three words or Two words? Is there a dash somewhere there? And also because the pronunciation differs from one person to another. Intra-yoo-te-reen or intra-yoo-te-rayn? Thank God for abbreviations! :) We can just stick with IUI.
So what is it and how does it work? If you are having some fertility issues, or you have a friend or a family member who's been trying for yeeeears to have a baby, maybe this post will help you understand the process. I'm not an expert, so it's still best to consult a specialist. :) I'll just be sharing what Jay and I went through financially, physically, emotionally and mentally, for the last 5 years.
Here we go… Warning: Looooooong post ahead. (But I'll cut this post into 2 parts to hopefully trick your brain that it's not that long).
Just a not-so-quick background, Jay and I have been married for 5 years and we started trying to get pregnant right off the bat. I secretly wished for a honeymoon baby and I must've put a great deal of pressure on Jay at that time. Poor guy. My idea then was: First comes love, then comes marriage, then comes a baby (in a baby carriage! I know you want to sing it), with a very short time interval between the last two events. Love and marriage happened at the perfect time. The third one, well, we're getting there. I just thought it would happen really quickly.
Now I'm not the type who tracks her monthly period. I just didn't see the need for it until after a couple of months of trying to conceive (TTC) unsuccessfully. And I started tracking not just my period, but also our BD's (Check this post if you want to know what this is. Haha). When it didn't work by August after doing the deed as often as humanly possible (Beyb and I got married on May 2011), my dad recommended that I consult one of her clients who's an OB-GYN. She just told me to lose weight, eat healthy and to continue with our BD on certain days of the month. All were such a good idea, if your monthly period comes like clockwork. We never went back to her. Jay also didn't like her because she spent a great deal of time promoting organic foods during our first and only consultation. We couldn't say good bye to our late night fast-food runs. Yep, that's the perk of living in close proximity to 5 McDonald's stores which are open 24/7.
Dr. #1 was the first of many OB-GYNs we would visit over the course of 5 years. We are now on our 8th, and hopefully our last. Three of those doctors are Reproductive Endocrinologists or infertility experts. Our first RE was very motherly. She encouraged me to lose weight, and she gave me fertility pills to help me ovulate. She was the one who ordered for a TVS (transvaginal ultrasound) to check my ovaries and that's when I found out I have PCOS. However, she also had a lot of patients that we had to wait a minimum of 2 hours to see her whether we're the first patient in line or not. And consultations with her were very short and a lot of times I have to tell her AGAIN what's wrong with me. Or the other way around. "Oh, those pimples on your chin, that means you have PCOS." Yeah, tell me something I don't know, doc. I felt like a number, just another patient she needs to see. So we parted ways and never looked back.
Our 2nd RE was intimidating and Jay never had the chance to meet her. She's a very methodical, straightforward, no-nonsense doctor. The first time I met her, she gave me a piece of paper with her fertility plan. It included constant medication for 6 months to regulate my period, 3 months of taking clomiphene to help me ovulate (you can't do it for more than 3 consecutive months), and other procedures along the way. She has 4 clinics and I just got tired of following her around. Also, during the time I was seeing her, I had just started with my new job and I couldn't skip work, and she's veeeeery strict with the timing of the check-ups and follicle monitoring. So our relationship just didn't work out. We called it quits after 3 cycles.
 |
| RE #2's Fertility Game Plan. See how thorough she is? |
TTC is very exhausting. I realized that my threshold for undergoing consecutive fertility treatments is just 3 cycles. After 3 unsuccessful cycles, I'm just not able to go through it emotionally and psychologically.
After resting for almost a year, Jay and I decided to go work on our baby project more eagerly. And that's when we met RE #3. You can see the other details about my experience with her in this post, and at the same time read about what happened in my cycle before our IUI.
But rest your eyes first, stretch your legs, go get some water, and I'll be back with part 2 of this post. :)
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